Life After Shyness^TM

Many people who were once ruled by their shyness, learn how to ask for what they want, handle social situations, handle rejection, and accept themselves --- then wonder “What´s next?” and question  “I am no longer controlled by my shyness, why am I not now completely happy?” Learning to understand and deal with shyness is one step along a path leading to fulfillment.

It has been my experience that people who are working on their shyness are also deep seekers of the meaning of life and want to know how life works.  “Why I am here?” “Why am I shy?” “Why do I not seem to attract what I want?” “How do I get what I want and need?”  “Is there more to life than appears on the surface?”   they wonder.

If you are at a point where shyness does not rule your life (it is fine to still be shy/sensitive as long as you are also in touch with other parts of yourself), you are ready for the next step. If you have not yet reached this point, it is fine to explore the following if you are so drawn but keep in mind that your first priority must be in learning to “put your self out there” by taking some risks as this will give you the foundation for trusting that you can understand how the subtle aspects of life really work to assist you in fulfilling your life purpose. You absolutely need the ability to take action in life in order to create fulfillment and happiness so follow the self-help ideas on the Shy and Free site and seek help in the form of therapy and coaching when you get stuck.

Life After Shyness is similar to the Zen koan:

Before enlightenment, Chop wood, carry water
After enlightenment, Chop wood, carry water

meaning that your inner experience will be completely different following enlightenment as you go about your normal activities, feelings, and experiences. Externally, things appear the same but internally your experience is very different, which will in turn result in different external experiences.  Life After Shyness for many people will not mean a life without shyness, it will mean a new appreciation and sense of awe at all of life. “Ahh, this is me being shy” and “Ohhh, so this is me putting myself out there” and “Ahhh, so this is rejection” and “Ahaaaha, this is being confident” ...

Perhaps you now see that focusing on getting rid of shyness is similar to focusing on enlightenment which as all the spiritual teachers tell us, is a sure way not to achieve it. Instead, focus on the moment and be Shy and Free which will lead to incredible moments of transcendence. 

Many people make it very far along their journey, but give up because shyness returns. It is not the shyness which matters, but how you perceive, judge, and accept the shyness that determines how it will affect your life.

The following information is not for everyone as we are all on our own unique journey. If you do not see the value of the information below or do not agree with the methods employed, that is fine, no judgment is made against you just as no judgment should be made against the material as it could be very valuable to someone else´s journey.

Your Life Purpose

What if you could know the true purpose of your life?  Knowing the true purpose would help put all the pain and struggle dealing with shyness in perspective, help motivate you even more, and help answer the question “Why am I shy?”.

Knowing the true purpose of your life would allow you to see that your shyness lead you to a particular point in your journey that could best be arrived at by going through your shyness. All the aspects of your life (parents, childhood, environment, experiences, talents, personality) lead you to this point and now is the time to realize your purpose in life.

We all ask the question “Why am I here?” as various points in our lives and sometimes we achieve some clarity and sometimes we are left yearning for just a glimpse of our true purpose.

Understanding your true purpose requires you to look from a higher level than your everyday pain and stuggles. Looking at your life from the level of your pain and struggles will provide insight, but will not help you transform them. To transform your pain and struggles, you must view yourself and your life from a higher plane. “What is best for me and everyone else?” “What is in my best long term interest?”  “How can I take the high road in this situation?” are questions from a higher level.

You may be surprised to learn that there are methods of discovering your life´s purpose (I was).  My mind told me “There is no way any system or person can reveal my purpose because it is MY PURPOSE!”. This is a logical argument, but as you will see, is not an accurate one because life is not logical.

One method is from Dan Millman´s book “The Life You Were Born to Live : A Guide to Finding Your Life Purpose” based on some esoteric teachings, experience, and his own intuition.

You do not need to believe, understand, or have faith in the system for it to work for you. You do need to enter with an open mind and observe your reaction to the words presented.  You may instantly relate to the life purpose presented.  If you do not relate it could be that: you need some time to contemplate the words; you are not yet at the point in your journey to uncover your true purpose; or it could be that there was a mistake in calculating (double check).

You can receive a free Life Purpose Summary online at NumberQuest by selecting Free Stuff, entering your birthday, finding your birth number, and choosing “Free Sample Destiny Report “.

Please realize that the link to Numberquest is not affiliated with the Shy and Free site in any way.  Shy and Free earns no commission for displaying this link.  The link is provided because my experience with Dan Millman´s system was profound and I trust that you too will learn a lot about your life purpose using his method.  Numberquest does not use Dan Millman’s system, but it is similar and may provide some insights (and it is free).  Should you wish more information, for a fee you can request more details or you can purchase the book “The Life You Were Born to Live : A Guide to Finding Your Life Purpose” (Shy and Free earns a commission on book sales).

This book is not for everyone, please read Life After Shyness above for additional information.